The Book
The Opposite of Love
A roadmap for breaking trauma bonds and finding yourself again. Uncover the truth of emotional manipulation through Vicki Mills’ insightful exploration of narcissism.
Narcissistic Relationships
Dive into the enlightening world of The Opposite of Love, a groundbreaking exploration of narcissistic relationships designed specifically for women seeking clarity and empowerment. Written by Vicki Mills, who draws upon a wealth of lived experiences and expert insights, this book exposes the dark intricacies of narcissists' behavior while uncovering vital strategies for recognizing and navigating these toxic dynamics.
Readers will gain invaluable knowledge about identifying red flags, understanding the often mystifying 'Narcissistic Relationship Cycle,' and most importantly, breaking free from the debilitating cycles of manipulation that can ensnare them. The compelling narrative weaves together scientific insights with real-life stories, offering not just information but a powerful toolkit for reclaiming one's sense of self.
As women uncover the truth behind the narcissist’s charm and deceptive tactics, they will learn how to fortify their boundaries and recover their self-esteem. With a fresh perspective of love and loss, this transformative guide instills hope and resilience, empowering readers to take back control of their lives. Most importantly, it equips them with the mental tools to thrive beyond the grip of narcissistic relationships. Don't wait for change; empower yourself today by purchasing The Opposite of Love and embark on your journey to healing and rediscovery.
The Meaning of “The Opposite of Love”
shines a light into the dark corners of the narcissist’s mind. Narcissism is a subject of epidemic proportion, with too many women getting disproportionately hurt. This book is written by a woman who has been there, expressly for women. A “behind the scenes” look into relationships with narcissistic men! This knowledge can prevent or stop further heart-ache. Knowing the narcissist’s insatiable need for control and using people, will help you spot him quickly, slay the dragon, get out gracefully, heal and rebuild your life.
What You Will Learn
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How to know if your boyfriend, parent, or partner is is expressing narcissistic tendencies.
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Why a narcissist cannot fall in love with you.
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The phases of the “Narcissistic Relationship Cycle” to stay ahead of his game.
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The most important red flags to never ignore or excuse.
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The "Developmental Levels" for emotional maturity and why he stopped developing.
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The "Chemistry of Love" with a narcissist and whyit must be treated as an addiction.
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What are the most important boundaries and how to set and enforce them.
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Why you were chosen to be his mate.
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It is not your fault and how to make this clear to him without fighting.
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Why women stay in toxic relationships.
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What to say to a narcissist to regain your power.
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Why the trauma bond is so strong and how to break it to free yourself.
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How he undermines your other relationships.
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What to do when he shows you his true self.
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When and how to survive, leave, thrive and soar!
Narcissists are professionals at the game of charm, half-truths, lies, branding, smoke screens and gaslighting. Having these insights will make you powerful; because knowledge is power. This will be your “Superpower”, when faced with the all-consuming, lopsided power in a narcissistic relationship!
This book gives you the tools to unlock your own unending well of strength. You will stop questioning what is happening because you will know the answers and know what to do.
Summary of The Book
The Opposite of Love was written to help women understand Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It answers the important questions, cutting through the fog to give you the knowledge, know-how and support to avoid the pain and abuse of narcissistic relationships. Whether thinking about getting into a serious relationship, or already in one, you will learn how to deal with the reality of having a narcissistic partner through relatable educational chapters on the narcissist’s characteristics, tactics, and the tricks he uses to manipulate his partners.
Other topics are: Childhood Influences on both the adult narcissist and the person he chooses to be his partner. In chapters on; “Love Chemicals”, Addictive Bonding and Childhood Generational Trauma, you will be able to free yourself by gaining insight into how to shut off any abuse and break trauma bonds with solid boundaries you can keep. Written from a survivor’s and educator’s viewpoint, not a clinician's, gives a fresh approach. It is laid out like a roadmap, shining light on this murky subject makes it timely and much needed.
You will be able to gain more self-esteem and confidence for your journey from dating to discarding. It contains personal examples, navigational tools, knowable behaviors, strategies, tips and helpful actions. It will take you from recognizing “red flags” to not just surviving, never falling back into that “black hole”, to thriving and soaring in a new life that you so deserve.
Themes and Tone
Most important themes in this book are: empowering women, being there to support women and encourage them to gain back their self-esteem, sense-of-self, that are so often lost after being in an abusive narcissistic relationship.
Giving women the tools to avoid getting into a narcissistic relationship in the first place. Tone is supportive, sharing, giving solid advice and scientific facts for a woman’s protection. Maybe a bit more personal than most books of this genre, because the author is sharing her hard-won knowledge and insights into the narcissists mind.
Mood, while it is a mostly a dark subject, the book builds and lightens up as it goes on into chapters 10, 11, and 12 which were written as a trio of upbeat, strategies, and actions women can take to thrive and soar. The quotes, one for each chapter, are inspirational.
There are additional quotes in the last few chapters, for further healing inspiration amplified by more details in illuminating subchapters.
This book will give you the understanding of the true meaning of the “Opposite of Love”, so you can Slay Your Dragon!
Discover Beyond the Pages
This Section is under construction.
We are working to bring you new and exciting information on the subject of Narcissism, so your knowledge will become one of your “Super-Powers” to protect your heart! We are looking forward to adding in the future some of your feedback, latest discoveries about this Personality Disorder and any other information on other aspects of how to deal with abusive relationships.
Read Mary’s Story in the “Great Reviews” Section:
I received a wonderful letter from Mary who told me, after reading my book she is jumping “like the frog in the pot of boiling water”, out of her 48-year abusive marriage. She also told me she wanted me to tell all the readers that your partner, or husband doesn’t have to be a narcissist. There are so many other types of abusive people, and that her own husband is an alcoholic who had abused her in similar ways to a narcissist. She said that what she learned in reading, The Opposite of Love, is just what she needed to know after trying to cope all those years by apologizing for him, blaming herself and hoping someday things would get better. She finally realized she must end it for her own emotional wellbeing.
Please think of this website as a resource for you. Don’t miss the opportunity to explore topics that resonate with your own life story. I believe “self-help” books should go beyond the initial reading, to offer you further help. To have a place to continue the conversation. That is why I made this website, so you can have any questions you may have, answered.
If you write to me at vicki@theoppositeoflove.com I will be happy to answer your questions and welcome any suggestions or insights you may have to improve this website with new issues you would like us to explore about abusive relationships.
